squalor victorian

this should not, be the way. my heart should not beat, out of my chest. the only intention, was ever good. why did you have to make me so cynical. the absence, of you presence. it hurts. it hurts. it hurts. where are you now, 13km away. living. whats left of your life. whats left of my life. i dont forget. i never said. i know you exist. you are not a figment of my imagination. you are there. but why are you not there? where are you when i need you. where are you. you could show up, 17 years ago. where are you now. who will protect me? the life, that i know. the life, that you led. where are you. where are you. why do i always have to do this. why do i have to bridge. its so hard to breath. its so hard to breath. when you’re heart, when your heart, it beats out of its own chest. heaviness. is all i feel.